Yesterday I found out a friend from university passed away. For someone my age at 23, death is one of the last things you think about. For heavens sake! I’ll even considered getting married, settling down or buying a house before I consider that my friends will die.
And yet, he’s gone.
To be honest, I didn’t know him that well when we were at university. But I remember him as a pretty cool guy to have around. Last time I saw him was at a Christmas party playing board games two years ago. That guy was way to drunk that time to play Cranium.
Embarking on the journey of medicine, I’ve readied myself to deal with death at work. After all, I expect that I’ll be encountering him (or her). But I was not at all prepared to deal with death among my friends and family.
I always assumed I would have another chance to see my friend. I don’t know when, where nor was I making plans to. I just thought that we would run into each other some time in the next 10 years at least. The news was just so sudden and unexpected. It might have been unexpected even for him! I found out that a few days before he died, he just purchased a new car. A NEW CAR! I heard that he was so excited.
And yet, he’s gone.
I don’t know what exactly I’m feeling, and I don’t know how to articulate it. All I know is that I wanted to say something.
This makes me realize that I taken every day for granted. I always expect to see the sun rise tomorrow. His death showed me that death can come any day to any one of us, despite any upcoming exams, assignments or whatever troubles are going on in life.
From today on, I’ll try to live everyday with a sense of appreciation. Death brings a certain perspectives that make all those woes and worries seem not worth stressing about.
Dear friend, I hope you find joy and comfort wherever you are. I’m really sad that you’re gone. From what I can see, you will be sorely missed.
I’ll leave you with this comment from your closest friends:
You know I don’t drink but it’s one of the bottles you left behind last year. You were supposed to come back with the others and help finish it. Now that won’t happen. We were just talking yesterday and suddenly you’re gone. Here’s toast to you. Farewell my good friend.
Goodbye… dear friend.
A
Common Rounds 
I’m sorry about your friend. Death truly is hardest for those left behind, but I admire your ability and determination to become better and appreciate life from this sad event. In the path you’ve chosen death is going to take on a new meaning and learning to find hope and optimism in it, however trying, is a very important step. Again, so sorry for your loss and cheers to your friend.
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Thank you for your kind words.
I’ve learnt that death in certain cultures are celebrated, while in others is hushed as taboo. I think it ultimately comes down to the culture on how we were raised to treat death.
I’ve yet to treat any patients and experience the death of patients under my care. I’ve heard that doctors need to try and distance themselves and invest themselves personally into these events. I don’t know how I’ll feel. Hopefully by the time I need to deal with it. I’ll be mentally prepared.
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i’m sorry to hear about the loss of your friend. grief/loss is seriously one of the most confusing and difficult things we can ever experience.
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